NYAMA CHOMA FESTIVAL;do not be like last time.

As always it’s the biggest party of the year at least for the Twitter people. That place you go to and expect to have it all.

This Nyama choma Festival would be my third one. Though it would be my first one to find me in Dar all the previous two were in Arusha

So all was set, it would be happening the up coming Saturday I was quite excited.

As I chilled in my ghetto scrolling through my Twitter time line. I knew I wanted to go, but just that I could not find a good reason to do so.

As am still scrolling through my feed, suddenly my twitter message icon light ups .To check it out and it’s Prisca.😎

What does she want? I ask my self?

You see a few months ago I had fished her , you know kuzamring Dm,things went well that we even has a date set up.

Then all of a sudden she started blue ticking me. No answer no what just out know where she got lost.

Blue ticks hurts aisee. Thing can even get you depressed.You ask yourself yupo busy au ananiletea dharau. Or she realised I am not good enough?🤔🤔🤔

So here she was again like👇

“Hello potter sorry for ghosting on you. Haven’t been doing”

well mentally,you know how it can be.”

“When are you free? She asked

Maybe we can meet and talk, cause I really need that I can make it up to you.”

The she’s finishes it with 🥰🥰🥰🥰 emojis.

Aghhhh😁😁😁 breaks got loose. I could not think anymore

Before I knew it, I was already typing a response.

“Hey worry out” sorry what happened” 😎

“ Guess what I already have two tickets here for Nyama choma festival”

“It’s happening this weekend”

“Maybe You can join in”?

”that’s amazing patty" she answered

It's sealed ,she's on board. 😎😎😎?

Fast forward Saturday comes as usual it was a very hot one you know how Dar es salaam can be.

So I pick up my Prisca from Mwenge.Get her on a daladala sijui ndo mambo ya twitter standards but she told me she had never been in a Daladala hata nauli alikua hajui shs ngapi🤣🤣 any ways that’s a story for another day. By 5 pm we were already in Kijitonyama. We’re it was all happening.

The place was already buzzing like crazy.

You know that feeling that catches up with you after you’ve been paid and you loaded before you know it unaanza kuvimba.

That was was me only that this time I was not loaded with money but some hot babe beside me. So as we entered the place and yeah it was all great the smell nyama choma gets you excited.

So man I walk into the place , kisa mtoto mkaali .I ignore my buddies completely. That day nilikua sitaki shobo na mtu kama sikujui.

These niggers can’t be trusted.Boundaries muhimu

I chose a place near the high tables.

As we chill sipping our cocktails, Am chilled and playing relaxed but my mind is all running pretty fast.

Bob usije ukaharibu na hapa. Cause all eyes in the room were on me.🤣🤣

Honestly she was cool, not just from the looks but also also her character , you know those ladies so soft spoken with a baby face. That was my prisca.

Then prisca receives a call, did not know who it was but something like a niggers name popped up on the screen.

she ignored it from the expression on her face she was really disgusted.

Yeah at this point am like so she’s serious, all eyes on me.😎😎😎.

Kuchochea moto hapo hapo nikaagiza nyama kabisa

Around 7 :00pm

Before even my order could arrive,Idris sultan arrived aisee. You know stars.., he walks in and you feel the atmosphere change.

Dude walks past where we were seated and this is when prisca saw him,

To my surprise the other soft lady of mine all of sudden jumps like crazy

ohhhhhhmy god idriiiisss jamani, nampendaga huyu mkaka.

Ohh okay,everybody likes the guy.He is a celebrity.

From a nowhere prisca jumps out of her seat and there she all over the guy Girl even steps on my toes which really hurt just to go and give the dude a hug.

Idirs naye alivokua haachi kitu akapita naye hadi meza kuu walipokua wamekaa na akina Carol amd there i was nikabaki myonge pale.

Being on Tv is very powerful man And that’s one of the ways I found out. Hutumii nguvu nyingi

My order arrives, the guy is like boss vipi? Nyama hauli tena🤣🤣🤣.

Despite everything that just happened I did not have the guts to leave my meat behind .So I just got one big envelope and put it there.

Every body was pointing at me😅😅, not sure what they were saying but they must be laughing at me for sure.

Baada ya kuvimba koote kule the guys were having the last laugh.

So as am about to hit the exit, hapo kuna ki giza giza flaani kama cha saa moja kasoro hivi . I hear somebody call me out patyyyy,patttty.

I look around hoping it’s Prisca, hoping maybe shes remembered me.

Waapi It was Furaha, the crazy Furaha, she was all excited to see me. Making me also feel like a celebrity.

We hug and then she goes off with all these questionss.

Upo? Unaeda wapi? Mbona baaado mapema? Hio nini umebeba? As she touches my package.

Duh! Umekuja kununua Nyama huku? We kweli kauzu? 😥🤐🤐

I tell her am heading home as I was kind of feeling sick but I am coming back to catch up with Damian soul akianza ku perform.

You see Furaha is the Total opposite of Prisca we can call her the Tamisemi types not diaspora

She talks a lot, does not takes no for an answer .Shes always every where.

The total opposite of your diaspora

lady. In short she is the original version of a (TAMISEMI?)?😅

I had known her all the way from those college days. We were never really close but we reconnected more on Twitter.

So as am heading off all stressed ,I was just trying to avoid her she holds onto me , and says

"twende woote na mimi nataka nipumzike"

Ohhhhhh, what did she actually mean by that? I tell her mimi naelekea magetoni? Hoping she would stay away.

She insists aisee. I try to read through the lines like what does she really want it?

😅😅😅 You know ladies? They are never straight forward.

As am still wondering Furaha keeps surprising me when she asks me

una request au tuite boda kabisa.

I told you she could be crazy.

So I call a boda and we head off.

My place was just a 30 mins ride away at some place around Makumbusho.

Fast forward we get inside.We eat the meat and and do some chit chats here and there as we catch up about post college life na maisha ya kusambaza CV yanaedeleaje.

At this point stress za prisca zoote zishaondoka.So after some silence as everybody is scrolling through their Twitter feeds.

Furaha drops another bomb.

“ oyaa tunasubiri, nini nataka nirudi zangu nyama choma” as she get her wig off🤣🤣📌😎

Ehhh😅😅😅👊 say what????? This girl must be crazy.

Sawa mama, I tell her though at the back of my mind am like 🤔🤔🤔 kuna namna hapa mbona mzigo rahisi rahisi hivi.

Anyways i grab the opportunity and boom cameras start to roll, 10 mins into the shoot.

Lady stops me!!!! And drop another bomb

Subiri, ……. subiri Ndomu zipo wapi? She asks me?

Aghhh I try to ignore her and continue going for it😎

With a more commanding voice she asks for the condoms.

"Hunigusi bila condom patrick."

Dah! I have an llb and I remember sex must be by consent or else it’s rape

Also she’s was sounding serious, so i jump out of bed and go get those things on. Si condom tuu.

This is around 9;00pm.

Aisee 10 mins letter after a simple search in the drawers I could not find the staff.😁😁😢

Ziko wapi sasa? We usually keep them in the under the mattress but they are not even there today.

30 mins letter as I hear her start kufyoooza fyoza . At this point I have already over turned everything in the room 😫😫😫😫

I could not still find the the damm things aisee. Tena of all days why today? Siku ambayo mambo yamejileta yenyewe

So I decide to contact ,Charles my room mate?

Oyaa kiss ziko wapi? Nina show mzee baba.

An hour later no response and still I could not find them

At this point it’s already 10;00pm na ghetto lote nshalivruga vuruga.

I start looking at her , nikitia huruma😥😥. Zile za just mara moja🤣🤣.

But nothing could save the day.

She just gave me that devils eye, like nigga you tripping.!!!

An hour later the Lady starts to dress up, and heads then head for the door.

It was over umepaiisha tena patty

I also dress fast and find her outside fast. We get a boda and puff we back at Nyama choma festival just in time for Damian souls performance.

Furaha did not even say byeee.

She jumped off the boda boda all cursing like crazy…i think I I heard her call me ngo’mbe🐮🐮🐮🤣

Looking at her as she walked away that when it hit me.

How much I had really under estimated her. She’s got character man.

Feel stupid back there , unlike her I did not care about our safety

Meanwhile, my phone beeps to check it our there were 2 missed calls and a text from Charles my roommate"

"Oyaa mbona hupokeiii simu sema Ndomu zipo juu ya net hapo"

I felt sick immediately😢😢😢😢😢😢😢.

Like Why always me? Au ndo tatizo Nyota?

Then I call out Furaha, she did not even look back but just have me the middle finger, 🤣🤣🤣🤣📌

Eat that.